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The privilege of being taken for granted.
(On our departure for Sri Lanka)
We have just been told that we can now meet with people from another household.    There will be a lot of benefit from this because nearly all research shows that people who mix with others tend to be happier.   Human contact with friends and family is built into our DNA and psyche and is a vital part of our mental well-being and happiness.  As we draw towards the end of mental health awareness week such a relaxing of restrictions could not have come at a better time.

So, what are you looking forward to most about meeting up again with people you love and care for?   There is so much extra joy in the anticipation, don’t wish this coming week away but savour the waiting and the expectation of sharing finally face to face, even if you can’t hug!   Think of all you appreciate about this person, what makes them so unique, what their gift to the world is and what a difference they make in your life.  Write some of this down.  

Friendships and family relationships that have been part of our lives for years, (for some of us even our whole lives!) have become so close and intertwined with our own that it is inevitable we have grown to take them for granted.  This is not a negative comment, but a simple fact that the closer someone is to us the more they become integrated into our very being.   This is incredibly empowering as it means we don’t have to double guess them all the time, or question their love or care for us.  Their love for us is part of the building block of our lives which enable us to thrive and flourish, knowing they have our backs and we are secure in their love.  In this way every parent wants their children to ‘take them for granted’.

The lockdown has given us all a chance to really appreciate the value of these deep mutually loving relationships that have been part of the ‘warp and woof’ of our lives.   I love the definition of this phrase: ‘the essential foundation or base of any structure or organisation’.  The chances are that the people we will be reunited with shortly help make up the structure and base of our lives and without them we would simply not be who we are.   Let’s use the gift of this enforced separation, which may never come again, to really express something of how valuable and precious these love relationships are. 

For many of us it will be family, and they can sometimes be the hardest to express our deeper emotions and feelings to.  We feel awkward and shy about shifting the conversation onto another level than the usual buzz and comfort of the everyday chats we used to have.  Personally I think it is worth it. 

I remember my parents coming to Birmingham to visit us just before we moved to Sri Lanka.   The three of us had a quiet moment on our own and I found my voice cracking and tears forming in an upwelling of emotion as I tried to express how much I would miss them and my concerns for them in our absence.  

Have a great reunion with your loved ones and tell them why you take them for granted(in the right way!).

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